Thank You to s.e.kwan for Commissioning this Translation ♥
Disclaimer: I cannot guarantee the complete accuracy of this translation
俺様レジデンス ―有栖川 VS 西園寺― Side: 西園寺
CV: Takeuchi Shunsuke (武内駿輔), Yashiro Taku (八代拓), Saitou Souma (斉藤壮馬)
Track 1: The Three Saionji Brother
Journalist: Well then, Mr. Fuji, although next month you will, at last, be assuming the position as one of the Group’s board members, what are your current thoughts on the matter? I would like to hear your eagerness in that regard.
F: Let’s see. There is indeed a sense of apprehension, however, beyond just being placed in a position of responsibility, I hope to open the path to a new future for the Saionji Group.
Journalist: What promising words. I’m sure that your father, the chairman, has high expectations for you.
Journalist: To continue… Mr. Ran and Mr. Gen, how does it feel seeing your older brother in the place that he is now?
R: I believe this is the natural progress of things. Our big brother is a very outstanding person, after all. Isn’t that right, Gen?
G: That’s right, he’s a person that I respect deeply. Fuji is someone I strive to be like one day. Oh, but naturally, the same applied to Ran too. They’re both people that I admire.
F: You say such heartwarming things.
Journalist: With such wonderful siblings, one can’t help but feel that way, right?
G: Yup! I’m blessed to have two individuals in my life to be aspired by.
Journalist: Mr. Gen, you seem to love both your brothers.
R: Gen is the youngest child, so he’s always stuck to Fuji and I like glue. And since I find that adorable, I end up accidentally spoiling him.
Journalist: Mr. Gen, is that true?
G: T-That’s… Please stop, Ran, it’s embarrassing.
F: Gen is an introvert, so bear with just that.
Journalist: My, what beautiful brotherly love. Witnessing it is even making me moved.
F: I’m honored by your comment.
Journalist: This will make a good article. I believe that the readers are extremely eager to learn about the inner dynamics of the world-famous Saionji family.
R: I’m happy for all the attention.
Journalist: Of course! Next month’s issue’s first 30 pages will be devoted to Saionji and Arisugawa, the two major conglomerate groups.
Journalist: Huh? Did I say something wrong?
R: No, no, it’s totally fine. We look forward to the article.
Journalist: Y-Yes, thank you. Well, uh, since that concludes the interview, we shall excuse ourselves.
F: Ran, see them off.
R: I’ll accompany you. Please come this way.
F: They’re gone, right?
G: Yup, they’re gone.
F: Hah, that was a mind-numbingly boring interview, wasn’t it?
G: It was so dull, I nearly fell asleep. Also, that old geezer dragged on for way too long.
F: He said a bunch of useless things. And Jesus, what “eagerness”?
G: Haha! That part was funny. What was it again? “I hope to open the path to a new future for the Saionji Group”? To think that such words would come out of Fuji’s mouth… Hahaha!
F: Don’t laugh. You try answering that.
G: Oh, welcome back, Ran.
R: I’m finally back, they wouldn’t stop rambling.
F: Hey, Ran, the next time there’s a request for an interview, examine it closely before you accept it.
F: Damn it, I’m tired. They wasted an hour of this Great Fuji’s time.
R: But Fuji, I think you put up a rather nice act. Though, Gen’s performance nearly had me laughing.
G: You’re welcome.
F: You, how exactly did you do that?
G: Huh? Oh, the “Please stop, it’s embarrassing”? Nothing really. I just threw it in. A personality like that is generally more universally accepted.
R: Whoa, dual personality, how scary.
G: I say those words right back at you. I could hear you click your tongue beside me whenever that older geezer kept talking.
R: Haha, you found out? Sorry, sorry.
F: And Gen, what was that about “deep respect”? You’ve never once had such feelings towards me or Ran.
G: Well, what else did you expect? If you want me to respect you then why don’t you act a little closer to a proper human being?
F: You’re one to talk.
F: Oh, hey, by the way, where did our housekeeper go?
R: Oh, she left earlier to buy things for dinner.
F: Serious? She’s away at the most crucial times? I was planning to tease her to get rid of some of my stress.
R: Haha, you’re getting all irritated. The base of your ears were twitching after the moment you heard the mention of “Arisugawa,” weren’t they, Fuji?
F: That old geezer’s sure got guts to mention Arisugawa in front of me.
G: Well, it’s inevitable. In the eyes of the world, we have a hostile relationship with the Arisugawa family. So for the journalist, it probably would’ve made good news material.
F: Damn it. Just being reminded of that man covers my body in goosebumps.
G: Fuji, you really hate Ichiya, huh?
F: It’s not merely ‘hate’. That thing isn’t human, it’s a talking gorilla.
R: Haha. While they’re indeed a straight-forward person, I can’t handle Futaba, the second son. He can’t take a joke nor does he smile.
F: Compared to a gorilla, that stubborn guy is still easier to handle.
G: Well, what can I say? That Ichiya loves you Fuji.
F: Hah!? Don’t say such accursed things. Just the idea of that idiot liking me makes me wanna puke.
R: Why’s that? I’m sure Ichiya’s no different.
R: Oh, but I guess the same applies to Gen too.
R: You hate Arisugawa’s youngest son, don’t you? What was his name? Miori?
G: Don’t you dare utter his name!
G: Because I hate him! The way he talks, the fact he’s taller than me despite being the same age, their stupidly good head, I can’t stand any of it.
F: Aren’t you just jealous?
G: Every time we meet that guy meddles with me with a grin on his face. I tell him not to get overly-familiar and he goes and calls me “Little Gen.”
G: Damn it, I’m getting angry again from thinking about it.
R: Yup, yup, you’re being completely played.
F: Looks like the other side’s got the upper-hand on you. Anyways, do your best, Gen.
G: You say that Fuji, but you just might be outmaneuvered by Ichiya.
F: Haha! That will never happen, the difference between me and that gorilla is that of a Moon and a turtle.
R: But that turtle has just become the Moon.
F: Are you stupid? The Saionjis would never lose to an uncivilized group like the Arisugawas. Once I enter our Group, I’ll make the Arisugawas unrivaled trash in terms of conglomerates! After all, I am handsome, extraordinarily talented and educated, and have already reached the pentacle of life; an absolutely flawless, super special person, the Great Saionji Fuji! Ahaha! AHAHA! AHAHAHAHA!!!
R: Hasn’t that typical line gotten a little long?
G: Yo, it’s super annoying. Also, where does that confidence even come from?
R: Well, it’s fine, no? The person themselves is enjoying it.
G: Haa… It’s hopeless.
Track 2: Bridegroom Battle
F: Hey Housekeeper, what’s up with this food? Not “is it not good”? This meat and this salad both taste cheap! These things that are entering the body of me, the Great Fuji, what do you plan to do on the off-chance I get sent to the hospital? Also, when there’s too much sodium it increases the risk of cancer-
R: Fuji, why don’t you just leave it there?
G: That’s right, it’s annoying. It’ll make the food taste bad, so could you shut up for a moment?
F: What!? She’s the one who’s at fault!
F: Hey Housekeeper, remake it. Don’t make me wait.
F: Seriously, what am I to do with her?
G: Fuji, your face is all lax. Disgusting.
F: It’s not.
R: You’re going at it again, the fact that you’re having incredible fun teasing the girl that you like is written all over your face.
G: Man, you’re a pervert and sadist; there’s no saving you. My condolences.
R: But even so, hasn’t been a year since Miss Housekeeper started working here? Time sure flies.
G: It’s already been that long?
G: Well, a lot of things have happened. When she first came, I wasn’t sure what to expect.
R: It’s nostalgic, isn’t it? Fuji went off and straight up yanked her around.
G: Isn’t that the same now? That guy has always been pushy.
F: Also, Gen had run away from home.
G: Can you not talk about that?
R: You were crying on a park swing, was it? And going waa-waa when Miss Housekeeper went to get you.
F: Why? Aren’t they cute memories?
G: They’re memories that I want to forget!!!
R: It really has been an eventful year, hasn’t it?
F: Well, even if it’s been a year, the taste of that woman’s cooking still hasn’t changed. I’m slowly getting accustomed to commoners’ food.
G: You say that, but you gobble everything up without leaving a speck on your plate.
R: He just wants the girl he likes to pay attention to him.
F: I do not!
G: You’re so easy to read, Fuji. But with that childish attitude, women will hate you, so be careful.
R: With girls, the key to be kind and sincere.
F: But I am being gentle.
G: No matter how you look at it, all you’re doing is teasing her though.
F: But aren’t you two the same in that regard?!!
TV Newsman: Onto the next piece of new… Yesterday, it was announced that Saionji Holding’s Chairman, Saionji Ryuutarou’s eldest son, Saionji Fuji, will be joining the Group as a board member.
R: Oh, Fuji, you’ve become news! Yo, hello, Board Member.
F: Don’t call me that.
G: Still, I never thought you would follow right in Father’s footsteps with how much you disdained it, Fuji.
R: We were shocked at the start, weren’t we? Though with this, our future is likely secured too. All’s well, ends well.
G: Fuji, why did you suddenly decide to follow in his footsteps?
F: Hmm? …No reason in particular. Staying stubborn became a pain, that’s all.
G: Eh? But being obstinate was your entire identity.
F: Shut up. In any case, it’s already been decided. I’ve accepted it myself, so what’s there to fuss about?
R: Well, as long as you’re fine with it, Fuji.
F: Have you decided on what you’re doing hereafter?
R: Eh? I haven’t decided on anything.
G: Sounds like Ran.
R: I mean, you never know what’s gonna happen in the future. Oh, but it would be nice if I could make a living through photography.
R: Oh. I see.
F: But, isn’t that a good thing? Rather than entering a boring company, living freely is more like you.
G: It’s rare for you to be saying that, Fuji.
F: Hardly. Do you have anything you want to do, Gen?
G: No, nothing.
R: Ehh? So immediate.
F: Well, Gen’s still got time, after all. He should take his time to decide.
G: Aren’t you a little unusually kind today?
F: Not really.
F: Oh. Yes, hello? Yes, I’m at home right now. Yes, I’m together with Ran and Gen. Yes.
F: Right now?
F: I got that. Yes, I’m going.
G: Is it Father?
F: Yeah. I’ve been summoned to the head office.
R: My, my, you’re so busy, oh Board Member.
F: I told you not to call me that.
F: Housekeeper, I’m going out for a bit. I’ll have my meal after I return, so leave some for me.
G: Mhm, he’s been summoned by our father.
R: Fuji’s been running around a lot lately, hasn’t he? I guess he really is busy.
G: I’m sure he’s fine, I can’t imagine him collapsing. On that note, why was he summoned?
R: Who knows, work probably.
R: Welcome back, Fuji, that took a while.
G: Huh? Is something wrong? It’s unpleasant when you’re so quiet, Fuji. Did something happen?
F: Ran, Gen, and also you, Housekeeper, I have something to discuss with you all. Please all go take a seat over there.
R: So, what is it?
F: I’ll preface this by saying, this was an order from our old man.
R: Did something happen with Father?
F: Please listen calmly. Housekeeper is being officially dismissed from the Saionji family.
R: Wait a moment, I don’t understand what you’re trying to say.
F: Then I’ll say it again. Our housekeeper is being dismissed.
R: Wait, what is with this all of a sudden? No, no, I’m definitely opposing it. I can’t be apart from Miss Housekeeper, not even over my dead body!
G: I’m opposed to it too! It’s true that she’s thoughtless, but dismissing her is going way too far!!!
F: It’s already been decided, there’s no changing it.
R: You’re kidding, right? This is way too sudden, and also, why is she being dismissed?
R: What? Why?
F: She’s going to be engaged to one of us.
R: Oh, oh, Fuji’s imagination’s just running wild again.
G: Jeez, don’t startle us like that. You nearly gave me a heart attack.
R: That’s right, Fuji, you should-
F: Do you think I’d say this even as a joke?
F: Starting today, Housekeeper will be living with us with the intention of marriage. The time limit is 3 months and during that period, she’ll decide which one of three us she’ll marry.
G: Marriage? What do you mean?
F: Listen, Housekeeper, there’s only one thing you have to do. You are to choose which one of us three will be the man you marry.
F: It’s exactly what I said. Between me, Ran, and Gen, you are to choose the man you want as your husband.
R: Wait, wait, what are you trying to do, Fuji? Even if you suddenly bring up marriage…
G: That’s right! It’s way too ambiguous. I won’t fall for a make-made story like-
F: It was a promise that her father and our old man made in the past.
F: Yes. A promise that she will marry one of us three once she becomes an adult.
G: What!? I knew that they were friends, but I never thought that-
G: Then the thing about her being engaged to one of us was for real?
F: It’s shocking, right? Earlier was the first time I’ve heard it.
G: I don’t know what he’s trying to do. Why has our father suddenly decided to reveal this fact now?
R: I was wondering the same. Like, why at a timing like this?
F: That’s well…
R: What’s wrong?
F: You don’t have to know.
G: Why?! It’s unfair that only you know that reason, Fuji.
F: Silence. It doesn’t matter.
G: Hah? How’s that fine?
F: Anyhow, the time limit is 3 months; that is definitive. Got that, Housekeeper?
G: Wait, Fuji! What’s happened to you? Wouldn’t you normally be the one most opposed to something like this?
R: That’s right. Even if it’s an order from our old man, you should think about it more-
F: If you two aren’t going to participate then she’ll be forced to marry me by default.
G: Why does it end up like that?!!
F: You got a problem? If I don’t have any rivals, there’s no competition. In which case, I’ll be taking her, alright?
R: As if we’d let that happen.
G: That’s right! Her belonging to another man? Not happening.
F: Then you have no choice but to participate. Or are you two going to just sit there biting your nails watching as she becomes mine?
R: Of course I’m not going to watch quietly. I’m not going to hand Miss Housekeeper over to you.
G: I have no intention of handing her over either. Frankly, it’s a huge pain in the ass, but since she’s on the line, my only option is to have my go at it.
R: That’s the situation we’re in.
F: Hmph, then it’s decided. In 3 months’ time, just who exactly will she choose to marryーー
R: So the competition is afoot. I doubt I’d lose, though.
G: Look who’s talking. Careful not to be outwitted you two.
F: This Great Fuji can’t possibly be defeated by the likes of you.
F: Hih? I’m not asking for your opinion.
R: Yup, yup, once we said we’re doing it, it’s set. Just go with it, Miss Housekeeper.
G: Isn’t that a bit late? You should already know what kind of personalities we have.
F: Well, it is what it is, Housekeeper. Be sure to make your decision. I’m sure you understand that, right?
G: Hey, wait!
R: Haa… There she goes.
F: That darn woman. Did you hear that parting remark?
R: The “I much rather a kind, sincere adult”?
G: Having her say that to us was really unexpected. But, it’s true that, right now, we don’t fit that criteria, right?
R: A guy like Fuji who’s constantly angry and always teasing her certainly leaves much to be desired. If it were up to me, I’d run.
G: No, no, that frivolous feeling where one can’t tell what you’re thinking that you have, Ran, must be a huge minus point.
F: If you’re going to say that then… A selfish brat like you, Gen, would be completely out of the question in terms of a marriage partner, right?
F: Then let’s do it the way she wants. We just have to check all the marks.
R: Well, seems like it.
G: Easy. I won’t lose to either you, Fuji, or Ran.
R: That’s my line.
F: What are you saying? The one she’s going to choose is this Great Fuji.
Track 3: Eldest Son・Fuji
F: Hey, are you awake!?
F: Wait, no… Ahem. Kindly… Kindly… Erm, ahem. Hey, it’s morning.
F: Come on, wake up.
F: Hey, if you don’t get up in the next 5 minutes, I’ll kiss you.
F: There’s not anything going on. I came to wake you up.
F: Isn’t that obvious? You’re my fiancee.
F: Really? I’ve decided to treat you differently from the way I have until now, after all. Don’t you think the difference in atmosphere is because of that?
F: You always say to me, “If only you were nice, Fuji.”
F: Frankly, a look of concern in yours or being on the verge of crying… I like seeing your miserable side.
F: I can’t do anything about that. It’s what excites me the most. It’s just that, right now, I have to do whatever I can to be chosen by you. And I realize the way I was doing it before wasn’t going to fly.
F: If I don’t tie you down with my chains, you’re going to be snatched away by Ran or Gen.
F: And that’s why, from now on, I’ll act the way you want.
F: I’m saying that I’m going to become the kind type of man that you love.
F: Well? You must be overjoyed, right?
F: Hmph, complete denial from the start? Heh. If you think it’s that impossible, why don’t we give a test?
F: Speaking of which, I haven’t given you a morning greeting.
F: Good morning, my princess. Did you have a good dream last night?
F: Why’s your face all red?
F: How was the good morning kiss? Should I do it on your lips next?
F: No, don’t run away. Look at me straight without trying to escape. Come on.
F: Why do I have to let you go?
F: It’s not that it’s unpleasant, it’s that you’re embarrassed, no? And that’s why you’re looking away. Your face is still red like before.
F: Nope. I told you, didn’t I? I’m going to change the way I do things. I’ll be bothered if you don’t fall in love with me.
F: So, from now on, I’ll be doing this…
F: That hurts, YOU DAMN WOMAN!!! No, wait, calm down me.
F: I see, I see. I guess you’re feeling a little unwell today.
F: No, times like that happen, right? It’s fine, don’t worry about it. Being pushed away by you is nothing. If anything, I find it cute.
F: Oh right, I was thinking of giving this to you.
F: It’s a bit early, but it’s fine, right?
F: I want to marry me.
F: No matter much you reject me, I will not give up. I will hand you over to neither Ran nor Gen. You belong to me.
F: You can wish for anything, I’m sure that I’ll be able to grant everything you desire. I will never allow you to experience misfortune, I promise. So, I want you to choose me.
F: I look forward to your reply.
Track 4: Second Son・Ran
R: Miss Housekeeper～
R: Can I have a moment with you right now?
R: Hmm? What’s the matter? You look a little bit down. Did Fuji do something to you, perhaps?
R: Figured as much. So, what happened?
R: Alright, I won’t ask you what happened. But, I can’t stand to see you look down. Therefore, why don’t we go outside for a distraction?
R: Yes, right now.
R: You’ll find out where we’re going when we arrive.
R: Don’t worry, I won’t bring you anywhere strange. There’s just something I’d like to show you.
R: Well then, let’s go.
R: It’s just a little further.
R: No, no opening your eyes.
R: It’s fine, it’s fine. Alright. Okay, we’ve arrived. You can open your eyes now.
R: I’m glad it made you smile. This scenery is beautiful, right?
R: As I thought, things like this bring you more joy.
R: I’ve been thinking about it hard. What would make Miss Housekeeper happy? What should I show her to bring her joy?
R: And so, I concluded that a place that would cheer you up would be the best.
R: You see, this is actually my special place. I happened upon it by chance when I was playing as a child and from then on, whenever I was unhappy or down, I would come here to look at the scenery.
R: The lights of the city twinkled like stars, and I remember that I found that incredibly beautiful.
R: And that’s why I wanted to show this to you no matter what, Miss Housekeeper.
R: This precious place, the view… It was because I wanted for you to smile too.
R: Isn’t that to be expected? You’re the most precious person in the world to me.
R: I was honestly surprised that it became such a fiasco this time. But, personally, I think of it as a chance.
R: With this, I finally won’t have to struggle against Fuji and Gen for you.
R: I imagined a future where you chose me.
R: And when I did, I could no longer say that the future’s a mystery. Even though I’ve never thought about wanting to get married…
R: It’s strange, right?
R: A future with you, Miss Housekeeper, seems fun. You becoming my wife, how many kids we would have… I kept thinking about those things.
R: And that’s how much I long for you.
R: I’ll definitely make you happy. I don’t care if the world becomes my enemy, I’m confident that I will always continue to remain faithful to you.
R: So, marry me.
R: Why? What is it that you’re worried about?
R: What do you mean by “that wasn’t it”? I’m of course telling you my true feelings. I’m saying that I would do my best to be as honest as possible for your sake, Miss Housekeeper. Is that no good?
R: Please, marry me.
R: I won’t ask for your reply just yet. I ask you to please choose the person your heart has set on.
R: That being said, I’d be happy if that were me.
R: Well then, is about time we head back. I can’t have the Princess be out this late, right?
R: Now, let’s go.
Track 5: Third Son・Gen
G: Oh, good morning.
G: Today I start from 1st period, so I’m early.
G: There’s nothing of note, really, I’m acting normal. Things haven’t changed from high school. The lessons are boring for the most part and I’m surrounded by dull people.
G: Wait, shoot…
G: Ahem, that was a joke just now. University is super fun! I’ve made a bunch of friends too, so it’s like I’m experiencing all sorts of new things every day.
G: Eh? What is? I’m not doing anything in particular.
G: There’s no need for you to worry. More importantly, shouldn’t you start worrying about yourself?
G: When you’re defenseless in front of me, I might just make a move on you like this.
G: Haha! Why did you let out a sound?
G: Well, I’m happy that you’re conscious of me.
G: You’re getting way too startled from a mere kiss. If we get married, I’ll be doing far more extreme things every day.
G: Though, I have to be chosen by you first.
G: Oh, that’s right, are you free tonight?
G: That’s a relief. Then, why don’t you go on a date with me?
G: Yes, I’ll bring you out on a mature date you’ve yet to experience. Look forward to it.
G: How is it? I tried reserving the best room in this hotel.
G: I request that we be able to have dinner in the room, so eat as much as you’d like.
G: Why are you so restless?
G: Who knows. I didn’t look at the costs, but it’s probably around 3 million yen.
G: Sorry, would you have preferred something more expensive?
G: Is that so? Then that’s good to hear.
G: Now then, why don’t we have our meal? Oh, or would you prefer to enjoy the nightscape a little more? Whatever you like. Today, I’ll listen to all your requests.
G: Oh, but before that, there’s something I’d like to give you.
G: As a token of my gratitude for all you’ve done for me, and my best wishes for the future, here’s a present from me.
G: This necklace is lovely, right? I think it’ll definitely suit you.
G: If it’s about the money, you don’t have to worry about that.
G: Turn around, I’ll put it on for you.
G: Yup, it really does suit you.
G: Come on, look towards the window. Do you see us reflect on it?
G: Right now, you’re incredibly beautiful. So beautiful that you wouldn’t lose to this nightscape.
G: Hehe, were you surprised?
G: Your neck’s a weak spot, isn’t it? It’s the first thing I knew.
G: I may look like a child, but I genuinely want to marry you. I’ll put everything on the line to make you happy.
G: Everything that causes you pain or sadness… I’ll take them all away. No matter what happens, I’ll protect you. So, lean on me without any worries. I’ll always be there to support your shoulder.
G: So, marry me.
G: What’s the matter? Was the date I thought of not good?
G: W-What are you saying? This is the date I wanted, isn’t that obvious?
G: I-It’s true.
G: It’s fun, of course it is. …It really is.
G: You’re getting the wrong idea. It’s true that I thought this would make you happy, but it’s not like that was the only purpose.
G: Huh? Is something wrong?
G: Decide…? On what?
G: Don’t tell me-
Track 6: Decision
F: What’s happening? Why did you call us out all of a sudden?
G: I knew it, you’ve decided on someone, haven’t you?
F: Is that true?
F: Then why?
R: Y-You’re leaving?
G: Eh? Why are you suddenly…
F: Wait, what happened to make you end up on that train of thought? I’ve been kind to you the whole time since then.
F: What? Unnatural? DON’T SCREW WITH ME!!! I went out of my way to research lines that would make a woman happy all for you, UNDERSTAND THAT?!!
R: Didn’t I appear properly sincere? I took you to a park, a public park. You were happy, weren’t you? Just how much internet research did you think I had to do?
R: That was a lie, a lie. I was aiming to be an agreeable young man. I’ve never even been to a public park when I was young.
G: I pass, right? I took you on such a wonderful mature date, after all.
G: !? What’s the big deal? I have money, so I used it.
G: Hah!? You’ve got to be kidding me, you even told me directly that you dressed up a little for it!
R: You don’t like that?
F: Why? You’re the one who said it, that you’d “much rather a kind, sincere adult.”
G: That’s right! That’s why, as you wanted, we-
R: What? That’s not what you wanted? What do you mean by that’s not what you wanted?
F: You prefer us the way we normally are…? But aren’t you always constantly complaining?
F: Then what? Are the usual complaints you say to us lie?
G: I don’t understand you, just what exactly do you want us to do?
R: Just be who we are?
R: Even if you say that, if we continued acting that way, you wouldn’t choose any of us, right, Miss Housekeeper?
F: ENOUGH! It’s a fricking hassle. No more trying to make her decide. In a situation like this, we should decide the outcome through a clear-cut battle.
F: The three of us will have a contest and the one who wins will marry her.
F: Listen carefully. It’ll be based on the memorization of chemical formulas.
G: STOP WITH YOUR NONSENSE! You’re just gonna be the sole winner, Fuji.
R: That’s right, we should make it something easier. Like, who can take the cutest photo of Miss Housekeeper?
G: That’s just because you’re good with a camera!!!
F: You’re being so noisy, what will you rather instead?
G: Eh? Eh… An acting skills showdown?
R: You’re not one to talk to about others either.
F: If it’s 10 digit mental arithmetics, you guys can do it, right?
G: EHHH? Why are you only able to think about yourself?
F: Shut up.
G: That’s something only you can do, Fuji.
R: That’s right!
F: Be quiet-
F: Huh? Damn it, who the hell is calling at this hour…
F: Yes, yes, that is correct.
F: Eh? Understood. I’ll head there at once.
R: Fuji, what’s the matter?
F: Our old man collapsed and has been taken to the hospital.
F: In any case, I’ll be heading to the hospital. What do you two plan to do?
R: I’m going with you.
G: Me too!
F: Alright, I’ll go get the car, so wait by the front.
Track 7: Truth
R: Fuji, how was it?
F: He’s asleep from the medications, but there’s no danger to his life. Currently, he’s in the ICU, so we aren’t able to meet face-to-face, it seems.
R: I see… In any case, I’m glad he’s okay. I was really shocked to have found that he suddenly collapsed. Do you know the cause?
G: Come on, tell us.
F: He didn’t want Ran or Gen to know, so I’ve kept quiet about it, but there’s no more hiding it.
F: ……Our old man has cancer.
G: Eh? Cancer?
R: Fuji, since when have you known that?
F: I was first told about it around the beginning of this year. Our old man revealed it directly to me, and from then, he’s been going to the hospital regularly for treatment.
G: H-He’ll get better, right? He’ll be fine, right?
F: He’s getting treatment so that he can get better! However, we still don’t know how it’s going to go. It’s been said that his condition may suddenly deteriorate.
F: Suddenly collapsing like he did today… It wouldn’t be strange for it to happen at any time.
G: WHY DID YOU KEEP QUIET?!! You’ve kept us in the dark about something that important!!!
G: Say something!!!
G: You’ve always been like that, haven’t you? You always try to solve things yourself.
G: Hey, are we that untrustworthy? I may seem like an idiot to you, Fuji, but we’re family, aren’t we?!! Because if so, you should’ve said it. Or what, DO YOU THINK YOU’RE THE ONLY ONE WHO’S GREAT?!!
R: Stop, Gen.
R: Fuji, I’m the type to think about things excessively, so I understand why you didn’t say it, Fuji. It was for mine and Gen’s sake, wasn’t it?
R: Saying that you’ll become a board member despite how much you were against it was because you knew our father was ill, correct?
R: I figured it was strange. Immediately after it was decided that you’ll be entering the Group, Fuji, the marriage fiasco involving Miss Housekeeper began, and there was even a 3-month limit. No matter how you look at it, it’s odd, is it not?
R: It’s all because our father is ill, am I wrong?
F: In regards to the marriage fiasco, it is as Ran said. Our old man was probably worried about the future. I’m sure he wanted to keep his promise to his close friend.
F: But, me deciding to follow in his footsteps wasn’t anything notable. It just became a pain to be constantly nagged by our old man.
G: No, if you said you wouldn’t take up after him, the burden would naturally be shifted onto me or Ran, your younger brothers. Fuji, you gave up your freedom in order to protect us, didn’t you?
G: …You took on all the reparations. Isn’t that right?
R: You’re so unfair, Fuji. You’re always taking the limelight.
F: There was no other way. Right now, the Arisugawa Group is rapidly expanding, and to be honest, we were nearly engulfed.
F: I talked big in front of you two, but long story short, the Saionji family is in a critical state, and amidst all that, it was revealed that our old man had cancer.
F: With the progression of things, the Group will face internal chaos, and I thought that I was the only one who could resolve the predicament.
F: You can’t stand at the top of this family with half-hearted resolve. I’ve received spartan training from our old man to become someone fitting to be at the top of the Saionji family since childhood.
F: Being placed under pressure, being berated with criticism from the world… I’m the only one who should face that.
F: Well, I am the Great Fuji, after all. My mental fortitude is on another level from normal folks. Ran and Gen, if it were you two, you’d probably be crushed immediately.
G: I knew it. It was for our sake after all, wasn’t it? Even though you were so focused on your research, to even abandon that…
G: Fuji, you had things you wanted to pursue. I, on the other hand, have nothing, and yet, Fuji, you-
F: Stop, I’ve come to terms with this life. I just want you and Ran to live freely. I wish for you two to do the things you want to do…in my stead.
R: What is this, seriously? Even though normally, you’re hopeless, being extremely intent only at times like these, isn’t that just sly?
G: It really is. I feel super, super embarrassed about myself for always complaining about you… I’m so sorry, Fuji. I’m sorry.
F: Hey, hey, give me a break here, don’t cry in a place like this, it’s embarrassing.
F: The things you’ve said don’t bother me.
F: Come on, Gen, stop crying already. C’mon.
F: Haha! You’re making a super ugly face right now.
R: Haha, you’re right. It’s ugly.
G: Shut up, it’s embarrassing, so don’t look at me.
R: Hehe. Ahh, somehow after crying and laughing, I’ve gotten hungry.
F: Hey, Housekeeper, when we get back, cook us a meal. Return to being our housekeeper just for today.
R: Why are you crying, Miss Housekeeper?
F: Haha! Your face is even more of a mess than Gen’s.
G: You’re right.
R: You should be gentle with a girl… Is what I want to say, but it really is a mess I think.
R: For some reason, I feel like I couldn’t care less about competing and such.
G: Yeah, frankly, I think this dynamic is the most fun,
F: I guess, yeah. What about you, Housekeeper?
R: Happy that we’re getting along…? I think I might understand the words that Miss Housekeeper had said.
R: Those words from before, her preferring us the way we are. It probably implied not when we’re teasing her or trying to smooth things over but when we’re honest like this, is what I think.
F: I see. It certainly is the way we naturally are.
G: I guess that means she’s been seeing us for our true selves from the start.
R: Can’t win against her, can we?
R: Yeah. You really aren’t a woman to be messed with.
G: Let’s head home.
F: Yeah, we should.
R: Mhm, let us return to our home.
F: Now then, how should I explain this to our old man?
R: It’s fine. Just say that we’ll be sharing her between us three as we have until now.
G: What are you acting all surprised for? Isn’t that the natural conclusion from what was said?
F: Idiot, it’s too late now.
R: You really are a fool, how unfortunate for you. In any case, we’ll continue to be in your care, Miss Housekeeper～
Track 8: Bridegroom Battle, Restart
R: My, what a surprise, who would’ve thought that our old man would be in such good health.
F: He ought to be a monster.
G: He was super full of energy when I met him yesterday too. He said he was going to work all day to make up for the time off. Though it does appear that he still needs to continue treatment.
F: Well, anyhow, I’m glad that things have settled.
R: But still, tomorrow’s induction announcement is going to be a big event, so are things going to be alright? Our old man’s in pretty high spirits, isn’t he?
F: I told him it wasn’t necessary even, that fricking old man.
R: Let it be. It’s a big moment, after all. Gen and I will be coming to watch, so do your best.
G: WHAT!? That’s the first time I’ve heard that.
R: Because it’s the first time I’ve mentioned it.
G: No, I’m not going.
R: Why? Let’s just go.
F: Do not come. Absolutely do not come.
R: Eh? What’s the big deal? I want to see your funny state up there, Fuji.
F: “Funny”? What is it that you find “funny”?
G: I’m definitely not going. You’re free to go by yourself, Ran.
F: Ran, don’t you dare come.
R: Eh? Even if you didn’t say that… Oh, right, there’s Miss Housekeeper! Hey, hey, why don’t we go watch Fuji’s induction announcement together?
R: Yay! It’s been decided.
R: Oh, then, then, we can go on a date together after.
G: I’m going too.
R: Why? You said you weren’t going just now.
G: If she’s going then that’s a different story. I wouldn’t want to leave her alone with an incarnation of lust like you.
R: “Incarnation of lust”…
R: Well, in any case, everyone’s going to come see you, Fuji.
F: What a pain.
MC: The Saionji Group’s Chairman, Saionji Ryuutarou will be offering everyone a speech.
Saionji Ryuutarou: Thank you everyone for gathering today. Our Saijonji Holdingsーー
F: Damn it, I want to leave.
R: Wait, Fuji, the announcement for your induction is coming. Are you ready?
F: Huh? Who cares, I’m annoyed right now.
G: What’s the matter? Why are you so grumpy?
F: That gorilla went and sent me something strange.
G: Huh? An envelope? What’s that supposed for?
F: It arrived this morning. A letter of challenge.
G: What? A letter of challenge?
R: What’s written inside?
F: “You’ll be defeated. I’m sure you’re watching.” It’s filled with nothing but crap in his filthy handwriting.
R: Haha, isn’t that the usual for Ichiya?
F: If it weren’t that… Damn it! I’m getting pissed off.
G: Oh, you didn’t know? You see, actually Arisugawa…
Saionji Ryuutarou: ーーAnd that concludes it. Thank you for listening to the speech.
Saionji Ryuutarou: Now then, I would like to make an announcement to everyone.
R: Oh, it’s begun.
Saionji Ryuutarou: Starting this fiscal period, my eldest son, Saionji Fuji, will be taking up the post as one of the Group’s board members, and I would like to make it known here.
MC: Well then, Mr. Fuji, can you address the audience?
F: Tch. It’s the worst feeling for me.
R: Come on, Fuji, do your best.
G: Don’t drop the ball, alright?
F: Shut up, be quiet.
MC: Please go ahead then.
MC: Mr. Fuji?
Saionji Ryuutarou: Ahem, Fuji.
F: I’m Saionji Fuji, I look forward to working with you all.
G: Eh? It’s over already?
R: Oh dear, oh dear, the mood’s completely gone sour.
G: I have a bad feeling.
R: Me too.
G: When Fuji makes that face, it’s almost certain that he’s about to make a mess.
MC: Erm, Mr. Fuji, umm… Do you have any extra comments you’re able to add?
MC: That must surely be a joke, right?
F: What? But I really don’t.
MC: Umm, then uh, we’d like to hear your plans going forth…
F: Plans, huh? I’ll be flipping the current antiqued ways of doing things on its head.
MC: As expected of the eldest son of the Saionji family. To laugh at even things such as that, you must be overflowing with humor.
MC: Everyone, please bear witness, this is precisely the young man who will take upon the Saionji Group.
F: Hey, what did you say about me just now?
F: Who’s overflowing with humor? Well? Are you trying to mock me?
MC: N-N-No, of course not, I would never. It’s just we’ve come to this point, so you should leave a message for everyone…
F: Hah? What message, you shitty MC? You’ve been going non-stop about boring crap.
F: To begin with, why do I, the Great Saionji Fuji, have to address the masses?
F: What’s with that reaction? It’s nothing but the truth. What’s wrong with calling commoners, “commoners”? Go ahead and say whatever you want because whatever you say it’s not going to hurt or even itch, you fools!
R: Oh dear…
G: He’s being way too atrocious.
R: In the end, it really did turn this way. So, so, Gen, what shall we do?
G: Even if you ask me what to do…
R: Hmm, let’s see… Let’s go see our old man for now.
R: Oh, he’s super angry.
G: This is being broadcasted on television, isn’t it? Fuji’s over, it seems. Well then, I’m leaving.
G: What, why? Can’t you tell by just looking? I’m making a run for it before anyone finds out that I’m related to that.
G: There’s nothing I can do in this situation.
R: No, it’s exactly as Miss Housekeeper said, Gen. We’re siblings, so we must save him.
G: What? What are you saying? I don’t want to!
R: Cleaning up after Fuji’s mess is our duty, is it no?
G: Don’t joke with me, I don’t remember taking on such duties.
R: Alright. LET’S GO!
G: Let go of me! NOOOOOOOOOOO!!!
F: Why are you guys here?!!
G: No, this is all Ran.
R: Hello everyone, I’m the Saionji family’s second son, Ran. And this is…
G: What, what is this?
R: Enough, just play along with me. Hurry.
G: I’m…the uh, third son, Gen.
R: I’d like to sincerely apologize to everyone for the rude attitude of my brother a short while ago, he’s not very good at talking in front of people.
R: His poor choice of words is but to hide his embarrassment. But well, that’s one of the things that make him cute. Everyone, did you know? Despite his face, he wears white, bear-patterned briefs at home!
F: Wait, why are you revealing-
R: That being said, from the perspective of us, his younger brothers, our brother is an outstanding person who deserves to be the future of the Saionji Group! Isn’t that right, Gen?
G: Oh, yeah, I respect my brother from the bottom of my heart. Yes, especially how he wears white brief.
F: I told you to stop!
R: In any case, please, please continue to take care of our Saionji Fuji～!!!
R: Alright, it’s a-okay now.
F: Don’t you trifle with me, what “a-okay”?!! WHO TOLD YOU TO TALK ABOUT UNCALLED-FOR THINGS?!!
R: Eh? Why are you getting angry? I’ve cleaned up after your mess. Look, everyone’s so moved that they’ve gone quiet.
G: No, they’re just disgusted.
F: Hiding what embarrassment?! Tell me what part of me is embarrassed…! You even start spouting about my briefs!
G: In that case, just don’t wear it.
R: That’s right. It’s the fault of the person wearing them. Besides, if I didn’t do that, we wouldn’t have been able to get things under control, so you should be grateful. You’ve at least read the mood a little, right? …Since you’re a massive idiot.
F: Hey, you called me an IDIOT STRAIGHT TO MY FACE JUST NOW, DIDN’T YOU?!!
G: Stop yelling. don’t bring us even more shame.
F: Who are you calling an embarrassment?
G: Ahh jeez… EXACTLY WHAT I SAID!!! Being an adult and not even able to make a simple address, you ought to be embarrassed…!!! Seriously, only your frame is big because inside, you’re but a kindergartener!!!
F: What did you just say!? You’re the one who’s more of a fricking brat, you cry and whine like a child when you don’t get your way!
G: DON’T CALL ME A BRAT!!!
F: Reacting to every little thing is precisely what makes you a brat.
G: Stop! Don’t pat my heat, you pervert!
F: As always, you’re so tiny, Gen.
G: Shut up! Even if I’m like this I’ve grown 1 cm!
F: Oh wow, isn’t that wonderful?
G: Don’t mock me with that face…!!!
R: Ahh, the pervert and midget have started fighting again.
F: Stop playing around, Ran. To begin with, this is something you caused…!
G: That’s right. What “saving”?!
R: Eh? The two of you are planning to blame it on me?
F: That’s right, it’s your fault.
R: I don’t understand why.
G: You were definitely having fun, weren’t you, Ran?
R: What else was I to do?
F: ARGHH!!! I CAN’T TAKE IT ANY LONGER! I’m taking back what I said the other day. Who the hell is going to live peacefully with the likes of you two? This Great Fuji will be taking Housekeeper.
R: Huh? What are you saying? Then, in that case, I want her too.
G: Wait, if that’s the case, I don’t plan to hand her over either.
F: Then that means the battle continues, huh? Now that it’s come to this, let’s have her properly decide.
R: Sure, of course.
G: I wouldn’t have it any other way.
R: Miss Housekeeper, are you listening? Anyhow, what we’re saying is, we’ll be restarting our competition.
F: Being all buddy-buddy doesn’t suit us. We’ll have a long, thorough contest and fight for you. That is the Saionji family’s way of doing things.
R: Now that it’s come to this, there’s no choice but to go until the bitter end, is there? We’ll struggle to the death for you, so you’ve made your resolve, right?
R: That half-heartedness isn’t going to fly anymore-
G: Ah! She ran away!
F: Hey, Housekeeper!!!
R: Ugh, there’s no avoiding it. Let’s chase after her.
Saionji Ryuutarou: Hey, where do you three think you’re going?
R: We’re just going after Miss Housekeeper…
Saionji Ryuutarou: Ho? But before you run after her, isn’t there something you three have forgotten?
Saionji Ryuutarou: The punishment of being struck by me.
Saionji Ryuutarou: Sho!
Saionji Ryuutarou: Chiku!
Saionji Ryuutarou: Bai!
G: It hurts!
Saionji Ryuutarou: Embarrassing me in front of the masses… The three of you, come over with me to my room right now.
Saionji Ryuutarou: Let’s have a nice, long talk.
F: Damn it, why did it end up like this?
R: What “why”? It’s your fault, is it not, Fuji?!
G: Well, that’s kind of true. If you hadn’t started acting strange, Fuji, this would’ve never happened, would it?
F: Hah? You two pointing the blame at me again-
Saionji Ryuutarou: Quiet! That’s enough, you lot are disgraceful siblings. Is this what I get for spoiling you?
Saionji Ryuutarou: It appears that you three need to be retaught again starting from square one.
G: R-Retaught? Father, what are you trying to do?
Saionji Ryuutarou: Can you not figure it out? I’m saying that I’ll be correcting those twisted personalities of yours.
Saionji Ryuutarou: Come on, take these three away.
F: Let go, don’t mess with me! Why are they-
G: Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, I get it, I won’t resist anymore. And, what does “correct” even mean?
R: I don’t know either. Just where are we being taken…?!
Saionji Ryuutarou: I’ll at least let you choose the direction.
Saionji Ryuutarou: “South or North”? Do you get that? A mountain in the south or a mountain in the north, which do you prefer?
G: Father, you’re joking, right? You’re lenient on me, right? You wouldn’t do something…so cruel, right?
Saionji Ryuutarou: Does this sound like a joke, Gen? They say that a doted-on child should be sent on a journey.
G: It’s over…it’s over for me. My life is going to end here!
R: This is bad, this is bad, WHAT DO WE DO, FUJI?!! At this rate, we’ll be relocated like criminals!!!
F: What? Relocated?!!
Saionji Ryuutarou: Take them away!
G: Wait! Wait, Father…!!!
R: That’s right! If we talk it out, we’ll reach an understandinggg!
F: Also, where did Housekeeper goooooooooooo?
F: Being siblings is a very twisted relationship to have.
R: Because we’re related by blood, sometimes we love each other more than anything and other times we hate each other more than anyone.
G: Nevertheless, when the three of us aren’t together, something feels amiss like a puzzle with a missing piece.
F: And that’s why we’ll probably continue fighting amongst ourselves.
F/R/G: ……Within the territory that is the Saionji family.